There's a solution to every problem

How do you get rid of that pesky bully?
There are several ways to defend your self and stop all that harassment.  I believe the best way to help deal with a bully is tell someone.  It could be a friend, a parent, a sibling, even a teacher.  Just make sure to tell someone what is going on.  If you keep it to your self your bully problem will never go away.  If this bully is really bothering you and you don't know how to get rid of him, talk to someone get ideas, get support!

Another positive non-violent way to get rid of  a bully is ignore them, and walk away.  As i said in one of my earlier posts.  The bully fiends of your hurt emotions.  Don't give them that satisfaction.  If bullies realize that they aren't upsetting  you they will usually stop.  Sometimes though bullies do get clever and try different methods of harassment.  Stay strong!  Keep walking away and keep ignoring them, at this point bullies will get bored.

Confidence is key.  A bully aims his harassment at those who are insecure and self-conscious.  They are the easiest targets and the most emotionally unstable.  Like a lion hunting a wounded zebra, an easy kill!.  Stay confident, be proud of yourself at all times and more times than not the bully will find it hard to make fun of you.  If you are still being harassed be sure to stand up for yourself and make sure that bully doesn't do it again.

Smile in the eyes of your enemies

Is bullying effective if it doesn't bother or harass the person its aimed towards?  The bully is satisfied when your crying, upset or hurt as a result of his insults and violence.  So why not laugh or smile at their insults.  When bullies call you fat, why not laugh instead of cry.    The bullies main objective is to see you upset, don't let them.   As time goes by the bully will realize his juvenile insults have no effect on you, and in turn will stop harassing you. 

Words Hurt - Bullying Commercial

Anti-Bullying ad

Just a thought..

Bullies attack others directly.  They tell you what they think of you directly to your face. They are honest and open about what their views, even though they are hurtful.  Now think...Are people that make fun of you behind your back worse than bullies? Is anyone that harasses someone else whether it is directly to them or behind their backs considered a bully? So are bullies essentially better people than ones who judge you behind your back?

That Hit A Nerve!

It seems like bullies know exactly how to piss you off or upset you.  They focus on you weaknesses and imperfections and target your self-esteem.  Bullies know exactly how to get under you skin, and hit that sensitive nerve.

http://www.youthvoiceproject.com/YVPMarch2010.pdf
Stan Davis and Charisse Nixon did a study involving almost 12000 5th-12th grade students about bullies and what they focus on. Students were given a survey and were allowed to answer more than once.  Fifty five percent of those students said when they were bullied it was because of thier looks and 37 percent of these students said it was because of their body shape . Bullies realize that looks and body shape are usually the main aspect of peoples insecurities, and tend to target those characteristics more.

Bullies also harass anyone that is a minority that is in any way, shape, or form out of the ordinary.  If your family is very wealthy, your seen as the snobby rich kid, or very poor your the poor kid who wears the same thing everyday.  If your lesbian or gay, you are treated as a freak and seen as disgusting.  Only African American kid at school, your automatically a gangster. Bullies pinpoint your differences and judge you because of them.

Thank you Google Images!

Was that really Necessary?

These last couple of days I have spent a lot time thinking about my blog.  Not just thinking about what to write for my next post but really thinking about the problem and how often it is seen.  Judging someone I think is a form of bullying.  Making negative judgments about someone before you get to know them is the epitome of bullying.

I think we have all heard the famous, "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all".  I experienced this exact situation this past Friday at work.  I am a waiter, so mostly all the money i make comes from tips.  We had an extremely slow night, there were barely any tables to wait on the whole night.  Towards the end of the night me and the rest of my co-workers were in the kitchen complaining how we did not make any money, and how it was practically a wasted night.  Several of my colleague's then say, "Well it doesn't matter to you anyway Omar, just have daddy give you some money."  I was shocked and disappointed by what was said.  I  felt as if it was something that was unnecessary and cruel.  I immediately, asked my colleagues if that comment was necessary, and if they thought it was funny.  I then told them that I have enough integrity and responsibility to get a job so that I didn't have to run to daddy whenever i needed money.  They were very embarrassed with what they said and apologized to me later on in the night.  I began thinking, if I hadn't defended myself that night, how often would they tease me about being a spoiled brat.  One solution to bullying is to have the self-respect and courage to stand up for yourself, even when the odds are against you..

Stop Judging me

I was sitting in my writing class, this past Wednesday, and I was thinking of a topic or problem for my blog project.   I was up until almost three in the morning the night before finishing a research paper that I had left to the last minute, so I was a little tired, both mentally and physically.  So the task of trying to think of a topic to write about was a little frustrating, my brain was overworked and overheating.  So I stopped thinking and started listening, hoping  to catch something my professor or classmate says that could help me generate an idea.  My professor then brought up the issue of bullying and started to explain how she was a victim of bullying when she was in high school. I could even relate to my professor because I experienced a lot of bullying growing up.  Then I heard another student express her opinion on music, and how she thinks music today (the music I love) is crap, or how she put it "unorganized noise".  Immediately after that I realized something that really is a problem in society today, and I felt I needed to address it.  

What makes your opinion better than mine?  Why do you have to judge every aspect of MY life as if it were your own. Get over yourselves! What gives you the right to tell me that the way I wear my pants or the way I walk is wrong?  I obviously don't fit the standard you have set for me.  In the world we live in today we are surrounded by negative opinions. It frustrates me when people feel obligated to express their opinions towards me, acting like they are doing me a favor. Stop worrying about me.  You do you, and ill do me!  Is it life as we know it or can we as society learn to look out for "numero uno" and stop judging each other.